Showing posts with label scars. Show all posts
Showing posts with label scars. Show all posts

Sunday, 23 October 2016

revisiting the past..


..find myself having to revisit this copy of the first operation notes. I am preparing for a talk, to explain my experiences as a patient with ongoing #sarcoma issues, with #Eisai, a Japanese pharmaceutical company.  It's difficult looking back because even the memory of the strength/non-strength/trauma makes me exhausted. Of course I am amused by the interest I caused the surgeons, having two left ureters...who knew? and as always, one half of my brain thinks in images and the possibility of art to explain the inexplicable.

That was six years ago, and Im really lucky to still be here, having had operation number two that resulted in more removal of more organs...phenomenally lucky also to have had what I consider some of the best surgeons in the world. Of course there is still no cure for #sarcoma and worryingly sparse clues as to the cause. I watch and try to make sense of mind-blowingly complex research into new chemotherapy drugs as I balance my thoughts between the realistic and hopeful.

- this just popped up on my instagram feed from a fellow sarcoma gal who was the recent star of the #sarcomaandyou exhibition...Holly- who is a bit awesome really


and I just found this in the fridge...



Saturday, 5 March 2016

#sarcoma operation #2

 the second operation didn't mirror the first-  it was a different experience. I held it together until the anesthetist sat with us to explain the procedure. He didn't stop explaining and reassuring me until I sobbed-part of a devious plan I thought, to get me ready for having my body taken over again. I then tried to make jokes in the pre-theatre, admiring one anesthetists' orange crocks- there was no magical vial like last time and I think I made the student anesthetist nervous, I was twitchy and ultimately the epidural only half worked. Still, I had more morphine post op this time- what's not to like. I'd always regretted not taking a photograph of my 70 or so staples the last time......an unexpected bonus then, for my portfolio.

.. a neater scar this time.